In Conversation With - Lucy Henry-Hicks, Owner & Director of DISSH.
In Conversation With is a series to discuss the bits often left unsaid - personal and intimate topics such as self-acceptance, relationship with mind & body and the societal pressures + unrealistic standards of life with the internet. Through this series, I hope you feel a little less alone and a whole lot inspired.
If you've not heard of Lucy Henry-Hicks before, I guarantee you've heard of Lucy's business baby. Feeling much more comfortable working her magic behind the scenes and out of the spotlight, Lucy is the ridiculously humble yet proud owner and director of Australian fashion brand, DISSH. What's more, she is wife to hubby Mitch and new mama to 6 month old Remi girl. From us to you, we hope you enjoy this conversation.
EC. I would love to chat about your experience doing inner work with Awakened Lifestyles. You've got so much going on with your career + a beautiful 6 month old bubba, how did you know it was time to delve into this work at such a busy stage of your life? You started this work prior to having Remi though, didn't you?
LHH. Yes, prior to having Remi and even prior to being married to my now husband. There's a lot that's happened since which is a credit to inner work and doing any kind of personal development because when you deep dive and uncover stuff about yourself, things really shift after that and there's a momentum that follows.
I was one of those people that ticked a lot of boxes on the outside but was so unhappy inside and couldn't work out why I wasn't happy. I was self-help obsessed. I had every book. I listened to every podcast. I would go to Gwinganna almost every month just searching for answers without really knowing what I was searching for.
There was a big catalyst moment - I was in a relationship for 10 years between 17 to 28. I thought he was my person but slowly began to realise that it wasn’t right which was driven by me and my unhappiness so I ended that relationship. I moved out into this tiny 1 bedroom apartment by myself. I remember feeling so alone and for the first time in my life understood that that’s not what I want, but what do I want? I just couldn't answer that question. I had no idea what I wanted. All I knew was that I wasn't very happy which started this journey of where do I go and who can help me figure out what's important for me and what I want in my life?
When you're with someone from a really young age, you don't necessarily get that space to explore yourself. It is such an important time to form a really solid relationship with self and without that space, you can find yourself in a position where perhaps you never do find yourself. I've met a lot of people who feel as though they’ve never really found themselves.
EC. You're a huge consumer of self-help podcasts & books. Do you think a problem stems from consuming this type of content without putting the work into practice?
LHH. There's definitely a difference between knowing the theory, understanding the “tools” and then actually understanding how to apply those tools day to day. Working with a coach gives you accountability for the application. When you show up every week, you can't really avoid moving forward which is the greatest gift of all. What’s funny is that I knew all the theory and could identify personality traits or avoidance traits in others but I was having trouble identifying it in my own life.
As an adult, you think you've done the work and you may even feel that you’re at a place where you’ve tackled some really big stuff, then sure enough, there's nothing like motherhood to make you question everything about yourself and who you thought you were. You’re tested in all these new ways and it shines a light on so many things. Who knows where I may have been post-baby without having done the inner work. Children are our greatest teachers. There is so much about the parenthood journey that shines a light on our own stuff but certainly being a business owner and a young Mum doesn’t help. The pressure I've been under these last six months … had I not had the tools and not done some of this work on myself, I just couldn't even imagine.
EC. You have so many balls in the air and have done for quite a while. How do you “balance” career, mum life, marriage, friendship, health & happiness?
LHH. Balance is such a loaded word, isn't it?! I tried for a long time to find and understand what that looked like and I have completely walked away from that. I just feel that it's not a thing and maybe certain personalities think differently about this. For me, it’s about understanding yourself more. I am an all-or-nothing, a-million-miles-an-hour kind of character and so at any given time, there'll be something that is my absolute driver and focal point and I'll be running at that. This usually means I am the worst friend or I can be the worst partner (not having enough in my own cup to give my husband what he needs). I just have to own that part of me, apologise profusely and surround myself with very understanding people who love me and can be at peace with that. There's different seasons, different weeks and different months and for me, it's forever changing.
Something else I’ve learnt through doing inner work is that if you can become a good communicator and communicate clearly when you're in those seasons, people understand. They love you. It's when you don't communicate that things get a little messy and someone feels that they're not getting from you, what they would like. It's often the guilt that we put on ourselves more than anything but if we're not sharing that we're feeling this way, how can we expect anyone else to know that?
EC. You are the absolute epitome of your brand. There is no denying your involvement with DISSH. You are ultra stylish in the same sort of undone, understated, effortlessly-cool way that DISSH is known for. What’s your thoughts on prioritising the way you look + a few of your tips to continue looking your best when life is really full?
LHH. That's a hard question! Can I say head to toe DISSH?! It works every time because I've got no time to shop. I do wear a lot of black. You can't go wrong with black. I layer a lot too which also helps. I’ve actually found postpartum dressing challenging though. I've found it challenging to maintain my style and what I feel is true to me working with a new body. I'm trying to be kind to myself but there's definitely moments where I wish I could wear something but know I can't.
Also, outfit repeating is a big one. Sometimes I do a fun little try-on night where I'll lay all my things out and Remy might be on the bed, then I'll try them all on and put some outfit combinations together. I always take a photo and save them on my phone to look back on. If I get 6 great outfits, that's the next couple of weeks.
Something I've always lived by in terms of my own style is that fashion changes and with that silhouettes change but I feel so strongly about always dressing for my body.
There'll be times where a certain shape is on trend which doesn’t work as well on me
and so I don't waver from what I know looks best on my body, even if it’s in fashion.
EC. In 2020, when you became the director of DISSH, there was no mucking around. You were the one responsible for taking DISSH through a major evolution, including global expansion, a huge change of aesthetic and a real emphasis on diversity and inclusion. Can you share a bit about what this process was like?
LHH. A little bit of backstory - My Mum and I were in business together for a really long time and it was getting to a point where that working relationship could no longer continue. We had different visions. My Mum had been in retail forever and she's done things a certain way for a really long time. I was fortunate enough to learn from her in my twenties. I was absorbing everything but I had this really strong vision for what I wanted to put out into the world and we were clashing.
It was a decision driven by our relationship. At first, it was a decision about parting ways, then it was a question as to whether I was going to start another brand or whether I was going to take DISSH and re-launch it in line with the vision I had for myself. In the end, what made that decision was Mum said - “I'm out, I don't want to do fashion anymore." She didn't want to take DISSH forward! I thought long and hard about starting over (and there is something really nice about a clean slate) or was there enough in DISSH for me to build on? We had a database, stores, leases and an Instagram following so there were really tangible things already in place that can help any start-up and so it made sense for me to try to work with what I had.
It was terrifying though. I had a lot of people doubting me. We were a couple months in and COVID hit which meant all our stores had to be closed, as well as our office and our distribution centre, so online orders couldn’t be sent out. It was a very scary time to be starting anything. I'd taken a loan from my father and asked him to really back me on that. He agreed but I think he thought at the time that he wasn't going to get that money back. I was at a stage in my life though (having already started inner work) where I felt clear on what legacy I wanted to leave, what I want to put out into the world and how I want to express myself creatively. That was very front of mind.
I had confidence in just really believing in myself, not listening to anyone else, going for it and trusting that if I gave something my best and if I gave it my whole, that is often the formula to success.
I'd been in the industry long enough, I was fortunate enough, I'd seen enough and I had a lot of experience as well.
EC. When you had this big vision in your head, were you relying on your current aesthetic and what you wanted and thought would be successful or were you looking to market research and driven by the way the industry was headed?
LHH. I am data led but I am definitely more gut led in everything that I do. My intuition tells me where to go and then I'll check that with data. For me, it was very much where I saw and felt a gap was missing in the market and what I wanted to wear but was struggling to find. I then shaped that with industry metrics but I’ve always been and always will be gut led.
EC. What I love most about DISSH is their partnerships. I know you partner with Suited To Success and Thread Together however I’d love to chat about The Encoreship which I am obsessed with. This initiative is all about women supporting women which I know is really important to you too …
LHH. I can't take all the credit. The program was initiated by the CEO of Alpha H, Tina. She had this vision around creating a return to work program for women. So essentially, you have to be out of work for a minimum 5 - 7 years and it's all about getting women back and engaged with work. Something we see a lot is women study, they go to university and build these amazing careers then take some time out to be a mother. If they've had a few children, this can be quite a few years out of work. They’re still incredibly qualified, passionate and intelligent but when they go to return to work, often 7 years out of the workforce, it’s very difficult for them to get their foot back in the door for 2 reasons -
Confidence in the individual - There's a lot of fear around re-engaging and not feeling like they're going to be capable or going to be able to keep up.
Being overlooked - I think employers overlook most women who have had big gaps out of their career which is just crazy to me.
The Encoreship offers a 3 month paid internship. We identify a position in the business that is of need which might be a position that's currently vacant that we're trying to recruit for. We've had roles in everything from HR to Marketing. We then interview all women who fit the brief of looking to return to work (or those who have had a big gap) and we hope that we can provide them with 3 months of training and re-engagement to build up their confidence and get back out there. It could be 2 or 3 days a week too, it doesn’t have to be full-time, whatever terms work for them.
My biggest why is believing strongly that a career for a woman and financial independence is key to her having control and power within her own life.
If you don't have any money or you're not contributing to the family financially, it can be difficult to have equal voice in decision-making and how the family operates. So I'm very passionate about how we can support women to continue to have both - have a career and be a Mum. There's no reason we should have to choose one or the other.
There are so many barriers to return to work. Some of those I’ve just mentioned around confidence and being overlooked but we can go further than that and talk about the cost of childcare, the lack of part-time roles or lack of flexibility offered by organisations. When you add all those things up, you can see where women get to a point and start to think - This is way too hard! I'm just going to stay at home because it makes economical sense or I just don't feel empowered or encouraged enough to take that big leap and therefore I put my own needs, desires & wants second to the family unit.
Flexibility is massive. We're currently working on a return to work program for our mothers who are going on mat leave and looking to come back. The reality is that there are very few part-time roles out there and a lot of women want those options. So, why can't we open our minds in terms of organisational operational practices and change the way we've been doing things to be able to make these things possible? It's not because it's impossible. It's simply been done a certain way for a really long time and no one can be bothered to think up new ways to do it.
I think it will change. It's got to change! I think COVID helped in that respect. It gave businesses a lot of tools that we previously didn't have like Zoom & Microsoft Teams. Honestly, it's a really exciting time to try to change expectations and norms. That's certainly something we're super passionate about at DISSH.
EC. Both you and your equally successful sister, Grace are quite the entrepreneurial go-getters. Do you credit this trait to your parents & the way you were raised?
LHH. Absolutely, I'm so grateful for Mum and Dad. Mum started her first business at 19. She opened a store back when women were either nurses or went to typewriter school. She was a bit of a trailblazer in that sense and really wanted to have her own business. Dad owns City Beach with his partner and they’ve built a great retail brand themselves. Both parents are entrepreneurial in their own right. We've always had very strong entrepreneurial values in our family.
Mum’s been incredible for showing us that we can be and do anything we want and to never let being a woman mean that our options are limited. Also, there was always a feeling at home that you can do and be anything you want, just decide what that is and then the whole family is behind you. My brother has his own business too. He's got a digital marketing agency based in LA. It's a great family unit to lean on. When things are tough, we all get through it together.
I think a lot about the values that I want to instil in Remi or the woman that I want to be as her role model. There’s days where I don't want to go to work, I just want to stay home and cuddle her. I remind myself though that I've got to be the person I want her to see me be. I need to show up and go to work and that's a sacrifice. I don't get as much time with her as I'd like but hopefully she'll appreciate that later in life.
Question From Previous Guest, Eleanor Pendleton - If you could decide what legacy you could leave, what would it be?
LHH. It will always be around female empowerment - having a career and creating a workplace where women don't have to choose. They can have a career and they can be a mother. That is something I feel very called to champion and so I'm going to give that the best that I can in this lifetime.